2021 has been difficult. Not nearly as much as 2020, but when it comes to my physical being it’s been tough. I entered 2021 only 2+ months removed from ACL reconstruction and meniscus repair surgery. All I heard going into the surgery was how quickly I would bounce back because my body was so strong and prepared for the surgery. I had no idea exactly what I was in for. I suffered setback after setback early on in the recovery process. The worst setback being blood clots that weren’t found for 3 weeks post-op. Because I was then pulled back in the recovery process – far more limited exercises and such – the knee began to heal in a way that scar tissue formed because I wasn’t as mobile as I needed to be. Hell I was still on crutches when they found the blood clots and they attempted to pull me from PT!
At the end of February I participated in the virtual Freeze Out 5k to benefit the Rescue Mission. I was beyond excited that I successfully ran parts of this, as well as the final mile. And then came another hit…although the surgeon had green-lighted me to run, he then informed me that I needed to dial back and get better at walking first because if I didn’t then my form would suffer in terms of running.
I believe it was that same appointment that he referred to my knee as concrete and prescribed a steroid that the best way I can describe it would be like oil for the tin man. Going into that appointment I could bend and straighten my knee, but it took extra work to physically position my knee. Post-steroid things loosened up and I could feel a difference, but even my Physical Therapist explained – you may be 5 months post-op, but you’re really more like 3 months because of all of the set backs.
In June the surgeon told me that he wanted to scope the knee and get the scar tissue removed that had formed and that would help better with my mobility. And he basically didn’t want to see me again until I was ready to schedule that surgery. Even the nurse was surprised by that last part because she called me later to find out why I hadn’t scheduled my next appointment and I explained that the front desk person told me I was all set.
If you know me, you know I am stubborn. So I still opted to not have surgery, and still haven’t here today. I’ve been of the mindset – tell me I can’t do something and I will show you I can. I admitted that I had not done everything perfect coming out of surgery. I did all of the exercises I was advised to do, but the blood clots – boy that was tough! I’m also hesitant to undergo another surgery after getting clots the first time around. I know it’s not nearly as severe, but there is still a chance for anything.
As I am sitting here reflecting, the biggest hurdle I am realizing is that I am in essence starting completely over to where I was 12 or 13 years ago when I really started running. I want to be able to go out and run mid 8-minute miles but I am forgetting that it took me 10 years of running to get to that point. I’m certainly not as young as I was either.
Starting over just sucks.
But it’s truly what I need to do…and yoga…lots of stretching and yoga.
So please feel free to send me some encouraging words if you have any – runnin4areason@yahoo.com . I’d say leave me a comment, but I have to disable those due to spam bots.
I am signed up for the Mountain Goat already for 2022. I need something to help kick my butt in gear!
